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Child Safeguarding Policy

Aenon Missionary Baptist Church (AMBC) cares deeply about the holistic, gospel-centered growth of its members and neighbors. One extremely important aspect of facilitating this growth is to take seriously the protection and care of the children and youth we interact with. God calls us to “defend the cause of the weak…to rescue the weak and needy; to deliver them from the hand of the wicked” (Psalm 82:3). This policy will empower church members, parents, volunteers, and program participants to protect the children and youth in our care in the following four main ways: Protective Practices and Policies, Defining

Child Abuse and Its Indicators, Responding to Policy

Violations and Suspected Abuse Policy Violations, and Creating an Ongoing Protective and Supportive Community.

Contents

Introduction …………………………………………………………………………………… 1

1) Protective Practices and Policies ……………………………….3

Authority of the Policy and Definitions of Adult/Children

and Adult/Youth Interactions ……………………………………….3

Policies for Sanctioned Events with

Approved Volunteers ……………………………………..4

Best Practices for Sanctioned Events with Un-Screened

Volunteers …………………………………………………………….. 7

Best Practices for Unsanctioned Events

(Informal/Neighbor Interactions) ……………………………….7

Screening Procedures ……………………………………………… 8

Registration Procedures ………………………………………….. 10

Incident Reports……………………………………………………… 10

2) Defining Child Abuse and Its Indicators …………………. 11

Definitions of Abuse/Maltreatment ………………………….. 11

Indicators of Abuse ………………………………………….. …… 13

Impacts of Abuse …………………………………………………… 14

People Who Abuse Children …………………………………… 15

3) Responding to Policy Violations and Suspected Abuse 16

Policy Violations………………………………………………………16

Responding to Suspected Abuse………………………………. 17

4) Creating an Ongoing Protective and Supportive

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Community ……………………………………………………………….. 21

Ongoing Survivor Support ……………………………………….. 21

Policy Dissemination ………………………………………………..22

Training Plan …………………………………………………………. .22

Policy Review ………………………………………………………… 23

References ………………………………………………………………. 24 3

1) Protective Practices and Policies

Authority of the Policy and Definitions of

Adult/Children and Adult/Youth Interactions

Because AMBC emphasizes involvement in the community as an integral part of our ministry, it is necessary to define the different types of roles and events that occur. There are four categories that define these interactions.

1. Sanctioned Events with Screened (Approved) Volunteers:

All regular programs of AMBC where children and youth have been entrusted to our care fall into this category including: BLAST Youth Ministries, children’s church, youth drama ministry, youth choir and youth usher ministry. In these situations, the Policy must be adhered to by all volunteers. See “Official Program Roles” below.

1. Sanctioned Events with Un-screened Volunteers/Adults:

Events that are sponsored by AMBC where children and youth are not entrusted to our care fall into this category including: Worship Service, Community Meals, and other family/community-focused events such as our church carnival. In these cases, volunteers may be any church member or neighbor, and while we do not require these volunteers to be screened or to sign the Policy, we will create a safe culture by educating our community about the best practices defined in it.

1. Unsanctioned Events with Screened Volunteers: Since many of the volunteers and staff involved at AMBC also live in the neighborhood, there are situations that arise when volunteers/staff will interact with children and youth in the community who are involved in our programs outside of scheduled/sanctioned events. This includes every-day interactions such as babysitting, having friends over, attending each other’s events, etc. While these interactions simply cannot fit into the parameters of the Policy, screened volunteers are expected to understand the best practices defined by the Policy and to work to create a safe, protective culture in our community in whatever ways are appropriate to the situation. See “Best Practices for Unsanctioned Events” on page 13.

1. Unsanctioned Events with Un-screened Volunteers/Adults:

Similar to category 3, there are times when neighbors/church members who have not been screened will interact with children and youth in the community outside of scheduled/sanctioned events. While these interactions are not under the authority of the Policy, we will work to educate our neighbors and community members in how to keep our children and youth safe, and while it is informal, we hope it will be an impacting force in protecting the children and youth of our community. 4

Policies for Sanctioned Events with Screened (Approved) Volunteers

Safe Spaces:

Because most child abuse happens in isolated situations and because most adults seeking to harm a child or youth prefer to do so in private, AMBC requires two unrelated, approved adults (18+) to be present at all times during official events. These adults should remain within eyeshot or earshot of each other and should not be in secluded locations with children and youth at any time.

If during an official AMBC program, a situation arises where it is impossible, despite a volunteer’s best efforts, to have another unrelated adult present, the volunteer must follow the guidelines below for observable, interruptible interactions. These exceptions must be documented on an incident report form, which will be signed by the program Youth Ministries Board of Director

Safe Mentoring Interactions:

Though one-to-one mentoring is discouraged, AMBC recognizes that at times one-to-one mentoring might come up. Creating a safe, trusting environment for mentoring is of the utmost importance. All one-to-one mentoring interactions should occur in observable, interruptible spaces. Mentors and youth should be able to be seen by any number of other people at any time. Because it is sometimes necessary to drive with youth to activities, mentors may drive one-on-one only to public places within 30 minutes of Rochester, with documentation and communication to the Youth Ministry Board of Directors as well as signed parental consent. Members of the Youth Ministry Board of Directors will occasionally drop by the mentoring location without notice. If the activity they are doing will not be in an observable, interruptible location (such as on a hike or to a home without other people around), or to an activity that is farther than 30 minutes away, a second unrelated adult will be required to drive with and participate in the activity with the mentor and youth.

Safe Discipline:

There will be times when discipline is needed. At AMBC, we use warnings and natural consequences when necessary. We ask that volunteers use positive reminders (i.e. “At BLAST, we respect each other – please respect the leader by listening”). If a child continues to disobey, please bring the situation to the Youth Ministry Board of Directors who will determine what further action needs to be taken. When interacting with children and youth in these situations:

Stay calm and do not overreact to problems. Take a “time out” for yourself if you find yourself having difficulty keeping your emotional balance. Seek help from other adults if necessary. Do not try to handle a very difficult situation by yourself.

Never isolate a child without proper adult supervision (such as removing a child from the classroom for consistently bad behavior).

Only when it is necessary, use a direct firm tone in discipline, while not talking down to or degrading the children and youth.

When someone from the Youth Ministry Board of Directors is available, she/he will be the one to take care of disciplinary issues. When not available, volunteers will approach discipline in the following ways:

○ Warnings

○ Natural Consequences (Example: If a child is being unsafe with scissors the consequence would be that the child can no longer use scissors.) 5

Safe Speech:

At AMBC, we speak to each other and the children and youth in ways that are encouraging and respectful.

Do not use humor or sarcasm in a way that is hurtful or belittling.

Use vocabulary that is appropriate to the child’s ability and understanding.

Do not make empty or unrealistic promises

Never threaten a child with bodily harm, even in jest.

Inappropriate Sexual Content:

AMBC acknowledges that sexual language is more than mere jokes, but a serious boundary violation. As such, the following are never acceptable:

Sexually suggestive language, racy jokes, sexual innuendo, descriptions of sexual experiences/habits

Uploading, downloading, or viewing pornography

Music, video games, and movies with sexual themes

If the church staff or volunteers want to give a lecture or organize a program to help children and/or youth understand age-appropriate questions about their body or sexuality, the event must be planned in advance and parents notified beforehand. When children and/or youth raise questions about the body or sexulity, AMBC volunteers and staff will answer the questions at hand in an age-appropriate way and inform a supervisor.

Safe Touch/Affection:

AMBC desires to show healthy affection to the children and youth involved in the programs through the following:

Displays of affection that are observable and interruptible

Kind words

Pats on the shoulder

Side hugs

Handshakes, Fist Bumps, High Fives

AMBC prohibits:

Sexually abusive touch or any touch/action that can be interpreted as sexual

Physically abusive touch such as striking, hitting, spanking, shaking, forcibly holding, pushing, or yanking a child

Touching a child’s or youth’s thighs, stomach, low back, or anywhere that their full bathing suit would cover

Any touch that is unwanted by a child – which may be communicated verbally or nonverbally (such as tensing up or pushing away)

Tickling

Playing with hair

Lap sitting (Except when age appropriate, such as babies in Nursery)

Full frontal hugs

Flirtation, or any behavior that may be perceived as flirtation

Children or youth to hang on adults or each other, or be excessive in their affection – if this becomes an

issue, gently redirect their affection to safe touch without embarrassing them 6

Immodest clothing – men and women should wear weather appropriate clothing that does not reveal or draw attention to: shoulders, chest/cleavage, stomach, back, butt, or upper thighs.

Extra Attention:

AMBC’s Staff and Volunteers are prohibited from displaying favoritism toward a child or youth or group of children or youth.

They may not give gifts to individual children and youth unless the gifts are able to be given to other children and youth at other times for similar reasons (e.g., gifts to graduating seniors, gift for teen volunteer appreciation), signed from church, given with someone else, or if it meets social expectations (e.g., giving an official mentee a birthday gift). All gifts should be approved by staff.

In a case where staff believe that a child or youth would benefit from extra attention, staff should be able to give a clear reason and receive authorization from supervisor. When possible organize a rotation of staff and volunteers for the extra attention.

Restroom Policy:

AMBC encourages parents/siblings to take potty-trained children to the bathroom before dropping them off, to minimize the likelihood that a volunteer will need to take them.

In the event that a child must use the bathroom, an adult staff or volunteer will:

Make sure no other people are in the bathroom

If a volunteer must enter the bathroom always prop the door open

Only help when necessary and help as minimally as possible. Once briefly giving help to the child, step back into the hallway until the child is done.

If a child needs help in the stall leave the stall door open and give the child as much privacy as possible

Do everything possible to make help observable while the child’s privacy is protected

Safe Electronic Communication:

Electronic Communication can be used as a useful tool to foster opportunities for positive relationship growth and convenient communication, but because there are private, unobservable aspects to it, it can also be used in ways that are unsafe.

Safe electronic interactions are observable/public when possible, or when not observable, only include content that adults and children and youth are comfortable showing to anyone, including the Youth Ministries Board of Directors.

At AMBC, we will work to create a culture where no content of electronic interactions is private or hidden. Anything that is shared through private channels between children or youth and adults is open to be shared with staff and parents as necessary.

Types of Electronic Communication

Video Chat/Sharing

Messaging/Texting/Emailing

Phone Calls

Posting/Commenting

Photo Sharing

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Online Multiplayer Video Games

Safe Interactions

The safest electronic interactions will include as much, if not all, of the following elements:

Public – Group messaging, phone calls within earshot of others, posting on a wall, etc.

Light content- Planning/scheduling, recognizing events, getting home safe, etc.

With permission – With signed photo release and verbal consent

During the day – A good rule of thumb is 8am to 9pm

Unsafe Interactions

If any of the following occurs in an electronic communication, it is no longer safe:

Deep/Concerning – Personal, emotional, harming/being harmed, etc.

Untraceable – Any content that isn’t saved (like

SnapChat)

Inappropriate/Sexual

Without Permission

Late at night

One-on-one mixed gender interactions between adults and children or youth

Best Practices for Sanctioned Events with Un-

Screened Volunteers

At AMBC events where participating adults have not been screened or exposed to the policy, it will be the responsibility of the AMBC staff to address issues of child safety as they come up, working to educate adults and children and youth about safe interactions. We will create a culture of safety where all screened, trained volunteers will set a good example of the best practices outlined in the Policy.

Best Practices for Unsanctioned Events

(Informal/Neighbor Interactions)

Because we highly value positive neighbor relationships at AMBC, we want to create a culture of safety for all of our informal interactions. To the best of our ability, we want to create windows of accountability into our day-to-day lives.

Our time with other people’s children and youth should be observable and interruptible. Do as much as possible to be seen by the public or other adults/parents and invite interruptions such as drop-ins or phone calls.

Suggestions for babysitting:

Parents

Make a list of expectations for your babysitter (Examples: play with doors open, refrain from posting pictures of your children and youth, ask for help with discipline issues, etc.)

Talk to your children and youth about safe touch and healthy interactions with other adults

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Let your babysitter know that you might stop by anytime, and occasionally do so

Babysitters

Keep open communication with parents (err on the side of oversharing information for any unusual situations)

Avoid secret or isolating situations

Suggestions for driving:

When driving a child or youth that is not your own, keep open communication with parents or other trusted adults.

Text or call when you pick children and youth up and drop them off

Let someone know if plans change or something unexpected happens

Suggestions for having children in your home:

Invite parents or other neighbors to stop by at any time when children or youth are in your home

Take a picture of the fun you are having and send it to the child’s or youth’s parent

Screening Procedures

AMBC aims to hire employees and recruit volunteers to work with children and youth who fit our Vision, Culture, Theology, and Values. In keeping with our values of protecting the children and youth in our care, as we hire employees or recruit volunteers, AMBC will require:

AMBC Staff:

Written Applications, Background Checks, Internet/Social

Media Searches, Reference Checks, Interviews

AMBC Leadership, Deacon’s Board, and Individuals Who Have Access To the Building:

Background Checks, Internet/Social Media Searches,

Interviews

Children’s Ministries/Youth Ministry Board of Directors

Written Applications, Background Checks, Internet/Social

Media Searches, Reference Checks, Interviews

Children’s Ministries Volunteers:

Written Applications, Background Checks, Internet/Social

Media Searches

If the screening process yields any inappropriate or concerning information, AMBC will take the steps necessary to protect the children and youth in our care and will refuse volunteers as appropriate. If an individual has abused a child in any way or has been convicted of a sexual crime, that individual may not work with 9

children and youth in any capacity. If the screening process shows that a candidate has ever been accused of a sexual crime or convicted of any other type of crime, AMBC will consult with appropriate authorities and will make the best decision for the ministry. 10

Registration Procedures

All children and youth admitted to our programs at AMBC are required to fill out a registration form. The registration will document who may safely pick-up a child or youth from an event and other helpful information about the child or youth. Attendance will be taken at all events. Once a child’s or youth’s attendance is recorded for an event, it is AMBC’s responsibility to supervise those children and youth from the time they arrive to the time they leave or get picked up.

Our registration form includes:

Who may pick up a child or youth from a church event

Allergies the child or youth has

Any medical concerns

Contact information in case of an emergency

Our programs where registration and attendance are required:

BLAST

Youth Choir

Childrens Church

Youth Ushers

Youth Drama

Rehearsals

Our programs where registration is required, but attendance is not taken:

● Are there any??

Incident Reports

AMBC uses incident reports for: injuries, policy violations, and family concerns.

Blank incident reports are kept at all program locations

Completed incident reports are to be turned in to

Youth Ministries Board of Directors or staff

Youth Ministries Board of Directors or staff files completed incident reports in locked files at AMBC in appropriate volunteer/child/youth files

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2) Defining Child Abuse and Its Indicators

Definitions of Abuse/Maltreatment

New York State Defines Child Abuse as: “The most serious harms committed against children. An “abused child” is a child whose parent or other person legally responsible for his/her care inflicts upon the child serious physical injury, creates a substantial risk of serious physical injury, or commits an act of sex abuse against the child. Not only can a person be abusive to a child if they perpetrate any of these actions against a child in their care, they can be guilty of abusing a child if they allow someone else to do these things to that child.”

Additionally, the term “child abuse” in this policy will be used to include the following:

Child sexual abuse

Physical child abuse

Child Maltreatment

Emotional Abuse

Neglect in all its forms: physical, medical, educational, and emotional

Child Sexual Abuse:

Sexual abuse and maltreatment include situations in which any adult or another child or youth commits or allows to be committed, any one of the following activities to a child or youth under the age of 18:

Touching, grabbing, patting, slapping, pinching, rubbing, fondling, groping, poking (or other forms of contact): a child’s or youth’s mouth, genitals, buttocks, breasts or other intimate parts for the purpose of gratifying sexual desire; or forcing or encouraging the child or youth to touch the parent, or other person legally responsible, in any of these ways for the purpose of gratifying sexual desire.

Engaging or attempting to engage the child or youth in sexual intercourse.

Forcing or encouraging a child or youth to engage in sexual activity with other children or adults.

Exposing a child or youth to sexual activity or exhibitionism for the purpose of sexual stimulation or gratification of another.

Permitting a child or youth to engage in sexual activity which is not developmentally appropriate.

Photographing, videotaping, or making any other visual, descriptive, or auditory recording of sexual activity or the sexual or intimate parts of one’s body.

Displaying to a child or youth any writings, photograph, videotape or other visual or auditory exposure to sexual activity or the sexual or intimate parts of a person’s body.

Sexual abuse and maltreatment include such criminal offenses as rape, sodomy, other non-consensual sexual conduct, and prostitution.

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Physical Child Abuse:

Physical abuse refers to a non-accidental physical injury (ranging from minor bruises to severe fractures or death) as a result of punching, beating, kicking, biting, shaking, throwing, stabbing, choking, hitting (with a hand, stick, strap, or other object), burning or otherwise harming a child or youth that is inflicted by a parent, caregiver, or other person who has responsibility for the child or youth. Such injury is considered abuse regardless of whether the caregiver intended to hurt the child. Physical discipline, such as spanking or paddling, is not considered abuse as long as it is reasonable and causes no bodily injury to the child or youth.

Child or Youth Maltreatment:

Maltreatment refers to the quality of care a child or youth is receiving from those responsible for him/her. Maltreatment occurs when a parent or other person legally responsible for the care of a child or youth harms a child or youth, or places a child or youth in imminent danger of harm by failing to exercise the minimum degree of care in providing the child or youth with any of the following: food, clothing, shelter, education or medical care when financially able to do so. Maltreatment can also result from abandonment of a child or youth or from not providing adequate supervision for the child or youth. Further, a child or youth may be maltreated if a parent engages in excessive use of drugs or alcohol such that it interferes with their ability to adequately supervise the child.

Emotional Abuse:

Emotional abuse is defined as the non-physical maltreatment of a child or youth (under 18 years old) that can seriously interfere with his or her positive emotional, physical, psychological, social, spiritual, or moral development. Emotional abuse might include, but is not limited to, patterns of: restricting a child’s movement, discrimination, blaming, belittling, denigrating, humiliating, threatening or scaring, excessive yelling, unrealistic expectations and demands, constant rejection, terrorizing, exposing a child to corruption, violence or criminal behavior, irrational behavior, and other non-physical forms of hostility or bullying.

Physical Neglect:

Parents and caregivers are responsible for providing a minimum degree of care for their children or youth. Physical neglect is the failure by the parent or caregiver to provide food, clothing, or shelter. It also includes abandonment, or inadequate supervision of a child or youth by a parent or caregiver.

Medical Neglect:

A parent or caregiver is required to supply adequate medical, dental, optical, and surgical care for a child or youth under 18 years old. This medical care includes seeking adequate treatment for conditions that impair, or threaten to impair, the child’s or youth’s mental, emotional or physical condition. Following prescribed treatment and obtaining preventative care for medical, psychiatric, and psychological care.

Educational Neglect:

Educational neglect includes failure to enroll a school-age child or youth in school, allowing unexplained absences from school, refusal of recommended remedial services without good reason, and failure to respond to attendance questions.

Emotional Neglect:

Emotional neglect is the failure of a parent or caregiver to supply a child or youth with the love and support necessary for a healthy emotional development. Examples include failure to provide warmth, attention, 13

supervision, affection, praise, or encouragement to a child or youth, as well as inattention to a child’s or youth’s emotional needs, failure to provide psychological care, or permitting the child or youth to use alcohol or other drugs.

Indicators of Abuse

While the first part of protecting children and youth from abuse is understanding the definitions above, it is just as important to be able to recognize potential abuse when it is unfortunately occurring. Knowing the indicators of the various forms of child abuse will enable AMBC, its members, volunteers, and leadership to be able to take appropriate protective and supportive actions when abuse is suspected.

Consider the Possibility Of Physical Abuse If You Notice:

Frequent injuries of any kind (e.g., bruises, cuts, fractures, burns)

Note the above especially if the child is unable to provide an adequate explanation for the cause of injury

These injuries may appear in distinctive patterns such as grab marks, human bite marks, cigarette burns, or impressions of other instruments

Pay particular attention to injuries that are present on both sides of the head or body, as accidental injuries typically only affect one side of the body

Consider the Possibility of Sexual Abuse If a Child Or Youth Has:

Torn, stained, or bloody underclothing

Difficulty, pain, or blood in the genital area when walking, sitting, or using the bathroom

Discharge from the penis or vagina

Injuries (e.g., bruises, tearing, bleeding), itching, or swelling in the genital, vaginal, or anal area

Urinary tract infections, yeast infections, sexually transmitted diseases

Pregnancy

If the child engages in the following atypical sexual behaviors: Placing mouth on sex part

○ Asking others to engage in sexual acts

○ Undressing others, especially if done forcefully

○ Imitating sexual positions with dolls

○ Inserting an object into vagina or anus, especially if child continues to do so despite pain

○ Manually stimulating or having oral or genital contact with pets

○ Making sexual sounds

○ Inserting tongue into mouth when kissing

If the child displays the following emotional or behavioral signs: Depression; emotionless or passive behavior; withdrawal from family, friends, church, or school; exhibiting low self-esteem or self-loathing

○ Lack of attachment to a caregiver; displaying distrust or wariness at the approach of adults, caregivers, or specific people; fear of going home that may manifest by arriving at programs early, staying late, and appearing frightened or upset when it is time to return home

○ Being constantly watchful, as though preparing for something bad

○ Sudden changes in behavior, including academic changes 14

○ Extremes in behavior, such as overcompliance, over-achieving or demanding behavior; frequent and inexplicable anger, rebellion, or running away

○ Self-degradation; self-injury (e.g., “cutting”) or wearing long sleeves on hot days (to hide bruising or other injuries); suicide attempts

○ Delays in emotional, cognitive, physical, or academic development

○ Unwillingness to change for or participate in certain youth department activities such as a gym night or swim program

○ Being inappropriately adult (e.g., parenting other children) or infantile (e.g., rocking or head-banging)

○ Bed-wetting in children who have previously outgrown it; nightmares; difficulty sleeping

○ Exhibiting high anxiety, including physical problems associated with anxiety, such as chronic stomach pain or headaches

○ Frequent, unexplained absences at school

Consider the Possibility Of Neglect If a Child Or Youth:

Is obviously malnourished, listless, or fatigued

Begs, steals, or hoards food or complains frequently of hunger

Is consistently dirty or has severe body odor

Lacks sufficient clothing for the weather

Untreated illness, injuries, health (e.g., unfilled cavities) or serious educational needs

Broken or missing eyeglasses, hearing aid, or other necessary aids or equipment

Has an untreated need for glasses, dental care, or other medical attention

Frequently absent or significant academic struggles

Is inappropriately left unsupervised

Abuses alcohol or other drugs

Impacts of Abuse

Though a child’s or youth’s injuries may be hidden from the untrained eye, child abuse in any form can result in immediate and/or lasting impact in all realms of the person’s well-being. Understanding how child abuse can traumatize the child or youth and have a lasting impact in the life of a surviving adult is a critical first step in preventing abuse and responding compassionately. Not every child or youth will display the impact of their maltreatment and not every adult will experience the long-term consequences of their traumatic childhood experiences, but all are at increased risk.

Impact on Emotional and Physical Health From Abuse: Children and youth who suffered from abuse are at an increased risk throughout their lifetime for: obesity, smoking, illicit drug use, alcohol abuse, marrying an alcoholic spouse, early initiation of sexual activity, unintended or teen pregnancies, sexually transmitted diseases, anxiety disorder, depression, attempting suicide, experiencing domestic or sexual violence, difficulties with academics, employment, or relationships, hallucinations, memory disturbances, or sleep disturbances.

Impact on Physical Health From Maltreatment:

Children who have experienced maltreatment are more likely to suffer from a variety of serious medical problems, including cancer, heart disease, lung disease, liver disease, autoimmune deficiencies, hypertension, diabetes, asthma, and obesity as adults 15

Impact on Spiritual Health:

Spiritual injuries from child sexual abuse or child maltreatment might include negative shifts in victims’ perception of God (e.g., perceiving God as cruel, unfair, punitive, distant), a ruptured relationship with God (e.g., feeling unloved by God), disruptions of faith (e.g., doubting God’s existence), decreased involvement in organized religion, and a decline in spiritual well-being and functioning (e.g., feeling angry, guilty or disconnected from one’s sense of personal spirituality). Children or youth who have suffered sexual abuse often endure spiritual injury and may feel guilty, doubtful of God’s existence or believe that God is unjust. Victims report a sense of enhanced betrayal when their abuser is a person they perceived as holy, and numerous studies have found that spiritual injuries are more pronounced in instances when the perpetrator is a member of the clergy.

People Who Abuse Children

The unfortunate reality is that the people who abuse children are not always those anyone would expect to do so. People who abuse children or youth utilize authority, trust, or physical force/threats to gain access and control over children or youth so that they can perpetrate the abuse. This is particularly true for people who sexually abuse children or youth.

Stranger Offenders:

People the child or youth has never seen or has had minimal interaction with. Stranger offenders gain access and control over children or youth using authority, trust, and most frequently physical force/threats. This is the smallest category of offenders.

Acquaintance Offenders:

Non-family members – a friend, clergy member, neighbor, pediatrician, teacher, church volunteer, etc. – who knows the child or youth or the child’s or youth’s parents. Acquaintance offenders generally prefer to leverage trust to gain control. To secure this trust, the acquaintance offender grooms child or youth victims by providing a variety of services and gifts including, but not limited to: attention, affection, kindness, privileges, recognition, alcohol, drugs, money, and pornography. The trust that develops as a result of the grooming process will often reduce the child’s or youth’s inhibitions and increase the offender’s control over the child or youth. This toxic trust eventually renders the child or youth virtually helpless, creating an environment for ongoing abuse, while increasing the likelihood that the victim will remain silent.

Intra-familial Offenders:

Related to the victim and are people who usually, but not always, live in the same house as the victim. The intrafamilial offender is generally considered the largest of the three child molester categories. Because of greater accessibility, intra-familial victims tend to be overall younger than non-familial victims. The primary challenge for the intrafamilial molester is not access, but the ability to exert sufficient control to both abuse and silence the victim. A seemingly greater correlation and interplay exists between the use of trust, authority, and physical force utilized by the intra-familial offender. 16

3) Responding to Policy

Violations and Suspected Abuse

Policy Violations

AMBC takes policy violations seriously. Violations will be documented when:

The incident fits the legal definition of physical, emotional or sexual abuse

Raises suspicion of physical, emotional or sexual abuse

Has happened more than once

Is more than a minor violation

In cases where policy violations continue or if they are more than minor violations, staff will escalate the response by providing further education and appropriate consequences where necessary, including limited access agreements as needed.

Limited Access Agreements:

AMBC utilizes Limited Access Agreements to clarify safe behavior around children or youth for community members who have:

Engaged in behaviors concerning to church staff

Violated the Policy repeatedly

Offenses that are related to children or youth

A limited Access Agreement is a written and agreed-upon boundary between an individual and AMBC wherein we outline specific concerns about an individual’s behavior, detailed appropriate behavior towards children or youth, and plan ongoing accountability for the individual. Limited Access Agreements apply to members of a church community. They do not apply to known offenders or church staff members.

Convicted Offenders:

If a convicted offender wants to join the AMBC community, we will contact the appropriate authorities and resources on how to best interact with a known sex offender. We will do the same if an individual has been credibly accused of child sexual abuse or any form of child maltreatment but has yet to be or was not convicted.

Staff Members:

If a staff member violates the Policy, they will be formally warned and then fired if the violation occurs again. 17

Responding to Suspected Abuse

Reporting:

New York State strongly favors the reporting of all known and suspected child abuse and maltreatment. Forms of this include:

Witnessed abuse

Children’s abuse disclosures

Consistent and egregious indicators

A perpetrator’s disclosure

Rumors a child is being abused

NYS recognizes that certain professionals are specially equipped to perform the important role of mandated reporter of child abuse or maltreatment. A full list of those professions can be found at the Office of Children of Family Services website (ocfs.ny.gov). To the extent that any staff member or volunteer at AMBC is a mandatory reporter, we require those individuals to comply with New York Law.

AMBC requires all church Leadership, Pastors, Volunteers, Staff and members to conduct themselves with the awareness of mandated reporters, whether officially mandated or not.

The abuse of children and youth is not only a sin, but it is a serious crime. When adults report suspected child abuse to the legal authorities, their report could save a child’s or youth’s life. In contrast, silence about suspected abuse brings incredible harm to victims and emboldens offenders. AMBC encourages its members, both mandated reporters and not, to contact the authorities immediately when a child or youth discloses abuse, when they witness child abuse, or when they observe signs of abuse.

To make a report please call:

Mandated Reporters should call 311

The State Central Register Mandated Reporter hotline directly at 1(800) 635-1522

If the child is in immediate danger, call 911

If a mandated reporter wants assistance in making a report they can contact the Deacons Board and/or the Youth Ministry Board of Directors.

After a church member has reported abuse AMBC requires staff to be notified and an incident report filed.

When a suspicion of child maltreatment is reported to the civil authorities and they decline to investigate, or a district attorney has not pursued legal prosecution, but AMBC believes the individual’s behavior might still violate the church’s policy, be immoral, be inappropriate, or be unsafe, AMBC will take the necessary steps to make sure the child or youth is safe.

Abuse Disclosures:

Because children or youth and adult survivors are reluctant to disclose abuse, AMBC acknowledges that survivors who choose to do so need our community’s utmost support. 18

When children or youth disclose, they almost always do so tentatively or by accident, and may later recant even when there is proof that the abuse occurred. If questioned directly, many child victims may deny the abuse. When children disclose intentionally, children may first test the adult’s reaction by pretending that the abuse happened to a friend or by supplying only a small bit of information. If a child discloses to you, the following are helpful tips on how to respond in the moment:

Stay calm

Show love and respect for the child

Thank the child for telling you and praise the child’s courage

If the child expresses guilt or concerns about getting in trouble, reassure the child that no matter what happened he or she is not to blame.

If the child expresses concern about not being believed, reassure the child that you believe him/her.

Allow the child to talk freely; do not interrupt, ask the child to repeat words, or probe for details. Use open-ended questions such as “What happened next?” or “Tell me more.”

Do not offer false assurances, such as promising to keep the child’s disclosure a secret.

Let the child know what to expect next and incorporate their input where possible.

Protect the child immediately from suspected offender.

Report the suspected abuse to supervisors/church leaders and/or authorities (see “Reporting” section above)

Document the disclosure and your report

Protect the child’s right to privacy and avoid the urge to turn indiscriminately to colleagues, friends, or family for advice. Instead turn to professionals experienced in handling cases of child sexual abuse and to carefully selected individuals who can provide assistance and support to the child and you.

Receiving an abuse disclosure is an honor, not a burden; it is a sign of trust. Victims often choose to disclose their abuse years, even decades, after it occurred. AMBC encourages anyone receiving an abuse disclosure to be guided by the following responses. 19